"sexist, egotistical, lying, hypocritical bigot"

Our color printers are constantly breaking down so the big boss decided to get us two brand new higher quality color printers. Awesome. Unfortunately, the space that is needed to occupy these monster size printers was not accounted for, thus causing a giant beast to be hooked up right next to our cubicles. I say giant beast for a couple of reasons. One, it is really the biggest printer I've ever seen--and not only does it print, but it scans and copies! oooooo aaaaahhhh! Two, when activated, this machine produces a humming sound equivilent to a blow dryer right next to your ear. It all of a sudden felt like we were working in the copy room on Nine to Five and, mind you, this is only ONE of the printers. Lucky for us, a small office was converted into a mini copy room of sorts and the beasts were moved in there. So now we can shut the door and hotbox with the ink fumes! Bring on the copy jobs...